Shena and Mom
Born in Flint, and raised outside of Tallahassee, Fl, Shena is a social worker, mom, and sister girl who loves hanging out with her friends. She also loves her mom. Find out what makes her naturally glam!



How long have you been natural?
I've been natural for ten years.

What are your fav products?
Shea moisture curl smoothie, carols daughter hair milk, as I am co-wash, eco gel-olive oil or coconut oil.

What's your favorite look?
I like to change my hair color because I think it gives me a different look even if I have the same style. Unfortunately, my natural hair color is a dull and dusty color that always seems to be darker than I would like.

Shena with her kids
What do you do for fun?
I’m a mother of two so they keep me busy, but I love hanging with friends. Out for drinks, traveling, and now being an active planner (a life of organization is in the near future).


How do you stay healthy?

I joined a gym in Sept., so I’m exercising 3x a week and planning lunches (at least m-thurs. weekly). I cook a lot too so I think that helps my family eat healthy. Also, I'm trying to drink more water daily. I can feel it in my skin, body, and hair when I don’t.

How has having natural hair contributed to your life?

I’m pretty confident at this point because it has been a while and it now seems the healthiest thing for my hair. Perming was definitely damaging my hair and stripping it to the max (I wore color often too). Plus a lot more women now are natural so it is encouraging to see that as well.


Did you have any positive hair role models growing up?
I'm not certain about positive hair role models. My mom's hair is super fine and curly too (she’s biracial), so I couldn’t look at her hair and see my own. A number of my friends and their moms wore their hair permed so I did as well.


Did you have 'hair envy' with your mom?

As a young kid I never really thought about different textures than my mom. I had really long hair and my mom always kept my hair in very neat braids and ponys. I never had hair envy with my mom. She is and always was beautiful to me and I feel I look just like her in a browner skin. I love my hair because it has always been soft, manageable, and a part of me.


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If you'd like to be featured in Naturally Glam submit your photos to [email protected] and answer these questions!

1) Where are you from/live and how long have you been natural?
2) What products do you use on your hair?
3) If you have a business, are in school, have a blog, products you sell, a job in a field you'd like to talk about, have initiatives and organizations you'd like to highlight, advice to give, or family that you are proud of and want to share, please do.
4) How has having natural hair contributed to your life? Your self-esteem?
5) What's been the best part of your natural hair journey or your hair journey in general?
6) What do you do for fun?
7) How do you stay healthy 

Photo via Serena Williams' IG
By Erickka Sy Savané

If you spend anytime online then you've seen pics of tennis GOAT Serena Williams and gorgeous daughter Olympia gracing the cover of February's Vogue magazine! She looks vulnerable, happy and fit-as-a-fiddle. Safe to say, motherhood suits her like Grand Slam titles. So what keeps this new wife, mom, and champion humble, you ask? Serena reveals it in this super sweet IG post that will have you saying, 'Awe....'

Photo by Mario Testino via Vogue magazine
Serena Writes...
"Women. They are so prominent strong and vital to my life. My mom raised 5 women (one passed) and 3 grand children. I love this photo because we have a close bond. This is what keeps me humble. They are not afraid to tell me anything after all I am the youngest of 5. I'm so happy Olympia has my mom as her grandma (of course she has Alexis Stepmom as well) and I"m happy she has aunts like my sisters Venus , Isha , Lyn and Alexis' sisters Amy and Hayley. Alll women! Coincidence? I think it not. She will fit right in.
In case you missed it, here are some other photos from her epic Vogue photo shoot, shot by famed photographer Mario Testino!

Perfect combo of mommy and daddy?

Olympia is a natural in front of the camera

Cutest cuddle ever!

Serena & hubby Alexis have fun! Do we predict mo' babies in the future???
*****
What keeps you humble?
Erickka Sy Savané is managing editor of CurlyNikki.com, a wife and mom, based in Jersey, City. Her work has appeared in Essence.comEbony.comMadamenoire.com and more. When she’s not writing...wait, she’s always writing! Follow her on Twitter and Instagram or ErickkaSySavane.com

By Erickka Sy Savané

Your husband turns his back on you and goes to sleep. In less than five minutes the room is engulfed by the steady sounds of his snoring while your mind is still fixated on the argument you just had. How can he sleep with so much hanging in the balance? He knows you’re not supposed to go to bed angry. It’s one of the first things you hear when you get married. But here you are playing with fire, having another brush with relationship death, even after ten years of marriage. Really? Why can’t you resolve your issues by bedtime like your best friend? Every time this happens you can’t help wondering if it’s a sign that your relationship is ultimately doomed. Perhaps it’s time you answer the question once and for all:

Will going to bed angry ruin your relationship?

Continue
You think back to the first time it happened early on in your marriage. What you were arguing about you don’t recall, but you do remember cozying up to him in bed, his back turned to you, whispering softly in his ear, ‘You know you’re not supposed to go to bed angry.’ In an instant he turned around, eyes red as fire, and said, “I will not make up with you so that you can have a good night’s sleep!”

Ouch.

It was in direct contrast to your best friend, an adamant believer in never going to bed angry, who made it look easy. Perhaps it was through talking to her that you decided it would be something great to adopt. And though it never quite worked out on your end, you wonder if it still holds true for them some 10 years later.

“Noooooo. We don’t go to bed angry.”

“How is that even possible?” you ask incredulously.

“We don’t dwell. We say we’re sorry and move on. It’s very comforting.”

“But is it realistic? Do you sometimes say you’re sorry even if you don’t mean it so that you can just go to bed?”

“No. We get into resolve mode. It comes from the fact that we’d rather be happy, and we hate when we’re angry at each other.”

She says it’s something they both decided they wanted early on in the marriage. Now they’ve been doing it so long they’d never go back.

Comforting indeed. In those moments when an argument between you and your hubby can last up to two days, adopting this attitude would be like red velvet cake from Cake Man Raven.

Imagine, knowing that everything would be patched up by bedtime.

Determined to get a second and third opinion, you ask two women who work at your daughter’s pre-school. Do they go to bed angry?

Egyptian Woman: Most of the time we try to resolve things before we go to sleep because they say it’s not good for your health.

Haitian Woman: If you feel like it’s something you can solve then do. But sometimes you just have to go to bed.

Egyptian Woman: It’s like a circle. You’re arguing and not talking, but you have kids so you have to talk. So just let it go. There’s nothing worse than not talking.

Haitian Woman: Sometimes something happens right before bed and even if he wants to solve it, you’re not ready. Not everything can be figured out that fast.

Somehow knowing the Haitian woman goes to bed angry helps. But really, it’s time you talk to your husband. Is he at all concerned that consistently going to bed angry might land you guys in real hot water?

“I don’t like going to bed angry,” he says. “But if I’m angry, I’m angry and I don’t want to not be angry because of some saying.”

“But don’t you believe in it?”

“No. It’s one of those things you pull out when it works for you.”

Hmmm…you think about the times when you’ve been so mad at him that if he even thought about pulling out the don’t-go-to-bed-angry-card you might actually chop off his hands.

He also feels people take advantage of it. “Hey, I screwed your best friend.” Said at 11:59pm. He’s got a point.

Honestly, there will always be something that you like about the idea of never going to bed angry, but doing so won’t ruin your relationship. At the end of the day, you have to make your own rules because sayings are everywhere. ‘The family that prays together stays together’ or ‘Love is never having to say ‘I’m sorry.”’ I’m sorry, but there’s nothing like a good apology. So after ten years of marriage, you’re ready to let this one go. The next time you go to bed angry, you’re going to try your best to have a good night’s sleep.

This article appeared on Madamenoire.com

Do you go to be angry?

Erickka Sy Savané is managing editor of CurlyNikki.com, a wife and mom, based in Jersey, City. Her work has appeared in Essence.comEbony.comMadamenoire.com and more. When she’s not writing...wait, she’s always writing! Follow her on Twitter and Instagram orErickkaSySavane.com



By Winnie Gaturu

Since my son started walking, I've received a lot of unsolicited advice from acquaintances to complete strangers: "You should have another kid to keep your son company," "You should have a girl," (as if I can determine the child's gender), or the one that bothers me the most..."You should have more kids in case one dies." That's downright disturbing!

Continue
Sometimes I want to yell, "STOP telling me to have more kids!
Some of my friends share the same sentiments. For instance, Emily, a mother of one feels offended since most of the people telling her to have more kids are the same ones who told her she was too young to be a mother in the first place. She doesn’t understand how the dynamic changed from her being too young to her being old enough. On the other hand, Valentine, a mother of four, feels that spacing kids out is wrong and the maximum age difference between siblings should be two years. That way, you get them all out in one go and get done with it. She’s also very vocal in telling other mothers, me included, to have more kids. Sigh!

That said, I have a couple of reasons why I'm not considering having another child now or in the near future. For starters, raising a child is not cheap. I want to offer my children the best I can and at the moment, I only have room for the one I have. Secondly, I have my hands full at the moment. I know you'll say I'm selfish but that's just how it is. Unless you'll pay the child's bills, help me carry the pregnancy to term, and raise the child for me, you have no business suggesting when or how many children I should have.

But I won't lie and say that these comments don't get to me. At some point, I even turned to Google to find out whether raising one child would make them spoiled, entitled or lonely like most people keep saying. To my relief, all these concerns are just myths. As a matter of fact, only children are as lonely as any other child with siblings, and being an only child doesn’t make them more antisocial than their counterparts with siblings. They also get to enjoy more perks since their parents can afford to provide more for them. Only children even end up developing a higher IQ. However, there are some disadvantages too, like only children feeling an immense amount of pressure to succeed by their parents, or feeling suffocated from too much attention.

Considering everything, I've made a decision to be content with my one child, at least for now. So to the people telling me to have more kids, STOP! 

Do you mind people telling you to have more kids? 
 https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DnsMSFjLFNw/We9aV3iBeiI/AAAAAAAADII/F9HbMPX6PfYe6aCJqc-eDi3Wgmu41YE4wCLcBGAs/s1600/Winnie%2BG..jpg
Winnie Gaturu is a writer, tech lover, mom, wife and student from Nairobi, Kenya. During her free time, she loves trying out new recipes, diy projects, filling in crossword puzzles and spending time with her family. You can catch up with her on yourhairandbeautywrite.wordpress.com.



By Winnie Gaturu

Since my son started walking, I've received a lot of unsolicited advice from acquaintances to complete strangers: "You should have another kid to keep your son company," "You should have a girl," (as if I can determine the child's gender), or the one that bothers me the most..."You should have more kids in case one dies." That's downright disturbing!

Continue
Sometimes I want to yell, "STOP telling me to have more kids!
Some of my friends share the same sentiments. For instance, Emily, a mother of one feels offended since most of the people telling her to have more kids are the same ones who told her she was too young to be a mother in the first place. She doesn’t understand how the dynamic changed from her being too young to her being old enough. On the other hand, Valentine, a mother of four, feels that spacing kids out is wrong and the maximum age difference between siblings should be two years. That way, you get them all out in one go and get done with it. She’s also very vocal in telling other mothers, me included, to have more kids. Sigh!

That said, I have a couple of reasons why I'm not considering having another child now or in the near future. For starters, raising a child is not cheap. I want to offer my children the best I can and at the moment, I only have room for the one I have. Secondly, I have my hands full at the moment. I know you'll say I'm selfish but that's just how it is. Unless you'll pay the child's bills, help me carry the pregnancy to term, and raise the child for me, you have no business suggesting when or how many children I should have.

But I won't lie and say that these comments don't get to me. At some point, I even turned to Google to find out whether raising one child would make them spoiled, entitled or lonely like most people keep saying. To my relief, all these concerns are just myths. As a matter of fact, only children are as lonely as any other child with siblings, and being an only child doesn’t make them more antisocial than their counterparts with siblings. They also get to enjoy more perks since their parents can afford to provide more for them. Only children even end up developing a higher IQ. However, there are some disadvantages too, like only children feeling an immense amount of pressure to succeed by their parents, or feeling suffocated from too much attention.

Considering everything, I've made a decision to be content with my one child, at least for now. So to the people telling me to have more kids, STOP! 

Do you mind people telling you to have more kids? 
 https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DnsMSFjLFNw/We9aV3iBeiI/AAAAAAAADII/F9HbMPX6PfYe6aCJqc-eDi3Wgmu41YE4wCLcBGAs/s1600/Winnie%2BG..jpg
Winnie Gaturu is a writer, tech lover, mom, wife and student from Nairobi, Kenya. During her free time, she loves trying out new recipes, diy projects, filling in crossword puzzles and spending time with her family. You can catch up with her on yourhairandbeautywrite.wordpress.com.